February 14, 2006

NICK TURNER FIGHT! - the photographer

If you have not yet read about the new direction of my blog, please scroll down and read yesterday's entry.

My first NICK TURNER FIGHT! was directed at a London based photographer by the name of Nick Turner. His site is currently under construction, so I have no samples of his work, but I'm sure he's often. That's why I decided he must take my headshots for free.

Picking fights with random people is a delicate art, I am discovering. Some don't write back and others, like the photographer, go in the completely opposite direction of where you want them to. Perhaps my initial letter started out too jovial. I intended to act like a complete jackass. However, I got back an email I simply can't fight with.

--- Nick Turner wrote:

Hey Nick Turner, I'm also Nick Turner. Isn't that hilarious? Speaking of hilarious, I'm a stand-up comedian in New York City. I'm getting pretty big and it's time to take things to the next level. What's the next level, you ask? NICK TURNER PHOTOGRAPHY! That's what.

I want you to take my headshots. I'm not the best looking person in the world, but I am the second. That's just a joke, you know us Nick Turners and our humongous egos. I'm sure being a photographer has given you quite the ego. But we deserve 'em right?

Anyway, I'm sure this will be a great partnership and this is going to be a lot of fun. The only problem is that you live in London, and I live in New York. Fabulous cities for fabulous people, you know. Another problem is that I don't have a lot of money. Larry the Cable Guy has all the money in this business and there isn't a whole lot left over for me. I'm not telling you to make a special trip to New York just to take my headshots, but if your coming my way, I'd like for you to schedule an extra day or two to maybe take my headshots. We could do it in Central Park or maybe even the Empire State Building. Oh, how grand!

So please, please write me back as soon as you can. I can't wait to get started

Gimmee them shots, Nick Turner

That was my letter. I definitely did not anger him. At all. It might has well been a Valentine's Day card. Here is the photographer's response:

Its an honour to be asked by a fellow Nick Turner to
take his picture...I'd love to comrade but i am in the
wrong country! thats a stumbling block I think...

But if i ever come your way I'll do it for sure...like
you say us Nick Turners should stick together....I
reckon there are enough NT's on the planet to populate
a small village or maybe even form our own free state!


How can I continue a fight with this guy. I'm pretty sure he just said yes to my request...and he called me his BROTHER! I'll have to start out a little meaner next time. Until then, fight on.


At 12:12 PM, Blogger kellee said...

maybe you'll discover you are the only argumentative Nick Turner!

At 8:27 PM, Anonymous Jonah Oppenheimer said...

Or try this:

Hey, Nick Turner asshole! I am the real Nick Turner and fuck you! Everything in England (or whatever*) is bullshit! Fuck you again! Tell me about yourself! Thanks, Nick Turner, a stand-up comedian.

It's worth a shot! (*"or whatever" was meant to indicate that you should use specific information in that space pertaining to that particular NT, but at second glance, maybe you should leave it, as it saying "or whatever" after something personal insults that thing. By the way, fuck you, Nick Turner! The photographer.)

At 12:12 AM, Anonymous Tick Nurner said...

You better not try that shit with me. 'Cause I'm crazy.


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